The importance of weddings and marriages in a culture

by Shweta Ramkumar

I’ve never been the biggest fan of reality TV shows, particularly the ones on dating, romance, marriage that make a real mockery of all these concepts amidst the facade that is the ironic and inherent reality of such shows. However, one that has always sparked my interest and curiosity is “Indian Matchmaking” on Netflix. Season 3 of the show starts tomorrow and I’ll be binge watching it in one night like I did for the first 2 seasons.

I find the concept of the show utterly cringeworthy and infuriating since it perpetuates the toxic patriarchal and sexist aspects of Indian culture🇮🇳. However, it can be used as an educational tool for better cultural awareness, understanding and intelligence.

The importance given to weddings and marriage in a cultural community can provide informative insights into its foundational value and belief systems. In India for instance, marriage is the holy grail and rite of passage for every individual. Indian women in particular are consistently programmed and trained since birth to prepare them for their inevitability of life as a wife, daughter in law, mother and are suppressed / controlled heavily by their families, religion and society in order to keep their worth and value in the marriage market intact. Every decision made for their lives is centered around how they will be perceived as the ideal, subservient, dutiful wife in her future and they face immense pressure to get married and ‘settle down’ by a certain age so that they don’t miss out or are left on the shelf and for their parents to feel like they’ve done their duty, fulfilled their responsibility and achieved a level of success. Dating in general is tabooed, almost forbidden, in India for this reason and marriage is treated as a lifelong union not only of two individuals, but two families🤵‍♂️👰‍♀️👨‍👩‍👧‍👦.

The show also highlights modern day arranged marriage practices which are still prevalent not only in India but in various other countries in the world. Most of the characters in the show are Indians based in the US, UK, Canada and India who, despite all the westernisation they’ve been exposed to and grown up with, still stick to traditional norms of marriage. Arranged marriage practices have come a long way since my parents got married in that system over 4 decades ago. Nowadays its more like Tinder and other dating sites, except the parents and marriage bureaus play the roles of matchmaking, screening out potential matches and letting their kids decide the direction they want to take things in. It is however, done with the intention of forming a lifelong marital commitment💍.

How are marriages & weddings treated in your culture ?

Have you ever felt the pressure to get married ?

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Hi, I'm Shweta

I coach non-native English speaking healthcare professionals how to advance in their career and build better relationships with their patients and colleagues by expressing themselves more articulately and confidently in the English language.

I work closely with healthcare professionals who work with patients regularly. I help them improve their communication skills when interacting with patients and colleagues, teach them how to show up authentically, assertively and articulately in their field of work in order for them to ultimately gain credibility, validation and respect.

If you work in a clinical role in the healthcare industry and would like to learn more about how to better connect and communicate openly with your clients / patients, book a complimentary 30 minute discovery call with me to see how I can best support you.

Shweta Ramkumar - English Language Confidence Coach